Joe Provo's Unfolding Web Junk

Eyeballs, eyeballs, eyeballs! Eyeballs everywhere!
Eyeballs, eyeballs, eyeballs! Floating through the air!

-The Cramps


Every page on the net is "under construction". These pages are "under mutation"; they change every time they are visited, barring a few nescessary constants. If you're lazy enough to stay here fifteen minutes and your browser supports META tags, we'll reload the page for you.

Service offer: send me unsolicited, "bulk" (commercial or non) email, and I'll proof it for 50 dollars a line! See here for more info on my valuable offer!

If you want to be blackholed at the gweep.net mail server, thou lumpish ill-breeding ratsbane, send mail to my old flame-bucket or to an old address. If you don't like something about these pages, or wish to correlate address scraping thou mangled ill-nurtured lewdster, send mail to my current flame-bucket. If you like something about these pages, send mail to web-comment where scraped appears in the mailto link.

Peeve-of-the-Moment:
Inaccuracy.

Rather Obvious Crimson Fact Number 60:
He worked at a small movie theatre in Williamsburg, Virginia in the summer of 1989.

"A construct made of cloned human tissue, augments, anxiety, depression, and unforcused rage, a killing machine for whichever humans rented me, until I made a mistake and got my brain destroyed."

I recommend visiting Ian Heavens Memorial, Scott Hazen Mueller'slink farm, or the free, global email-to-fax gateway from The Phone Company... before it is too late.

Want more spew? There's something about Church names that stick in my head...

And as a parting shot, a sample from the Weekly World Spew's concert, club and music classifieds:

Weekly World Spew
Concert, Club and Music Classifieds
Big Wang
 CD release party with ...
Beastie Sapling

NastyTones
 appearing for one time only with
 the masters of space music:
Poets

You won't want to miss this year's "Just Say Yes To Sex Chemicals" Benefit!

FIVE BANDS!
Surfing Mouth
It Should Be Oh-My-God-ning
Green Trees
Automobilehead
The Brotherhood
 . . . with the vicious Edward Heath!

You won't want to miss this Fall's WPI Quadfest!

FIVE BANDS!
Foove Choir
Spankings For The Abominable Snowman
The Antidote
Oshkosh Opera Company
Stylin'Tones
 . . . with Cocaine Taking weirdos!

Cheers,
joe