The Catfish's Changing Web Page

I don't care about the paychecks
I don't care about the job sec-ur-it-eee
I don't care about the rent
you know I'm out in the front yard sawin' up bill collectors with a chainsaw

-Mojo Nixon

Every page on the net is "under construction". These pages are "under mutation"; they change every time they are visited, barring a few nescessary constants. If you're lazy enough to stay here fifteen minutes and your browser supports META tags, we'll reload the page for you.

Service offer: send me unsolicited, "bulk" (commercial or non) email, and I'll proof it for 50 dollars a line! See here for more info on my valuable offer!

If you want to be blackholed at the gweep.net mail server, thou surly guts-griping fustilarian, send mail to my old flame-bucket or to an old address. If you don't like something about these pages, or wish to correlate address scraping thou bootless reeling-ripe dizzy-eyed strumpet, send mail to my current flame-bucket. If you like something about these pages, send mail to web-comment where scraped appears in the mailto link.

Peeve-of-the-Moment:
People on public transit who insist on wearing their backpacks while on very full cars. Put it on the ground, nitwit.

"A construct made of cloned human tissue, augments, anxiety, depression, and unforcused rage, a killing machine for whichever humans rented me, until I made a mistake and got my brain destroyed."

Might I suggest visiting the Rozz-Tox Manifesto... before it is too late.

Want more spew? Have a question? Ask the magic 8-ball!

And as a parting shot, a sample from the Weekly World Spew's concert, club and music classifieds:

Headlinin' in an all-star gig this Friday - 
Roach the Half Piston 
with Grateful Led 
and Persevering G!!

Tonight at BioSphere!
 Whomping War
 with a special solo a capella performance by
Bob Vila (of Dames On the Block)!

Vocalist, looking to play out.
Experienced in punk, skronk,
and synth-baroque.  I like synth-waltz, especially
Kids 2 Dudes.
Call Chris at 555-3888.

Toupe and the Gorehounds needs Singer.
We play beat, heavily influenced by
Many Big Platoon,
Altar Boy Bill Kitten,
and Lads Down the Street.  Contact Billy Bob at 555-1604.

Cheers,
joe